How To Forgive With Gods Help
How to forgive with God's help
Learning how to forgive others is one of the most unnatural duties in the Christian life.
It goes against our human nature. Forgiving is a supernatural act that Jesus Christ was capable of, but when we are hurt by someone, we want to hold a grudge. We want justice. Sadly, we don’t trust God with that.
There is a secret to successfully living the Christian life, however, and that same secret applies when we’re struggling with how to forgive.
How to Forgive: Understanding Our Worth
We are all wounded. We are all inadequate. On our best days, our self-esteem hovers somewhere between feeble and fragile. All it takes is disapproval-or perceived disapproval-to send us staggering. These attacks bother us because we forget who we really are.
As believers, you and I are forgiven children of God. We have been lovingly adopted into his royal family as his sons and daughters. Our true worth comes from our relationship to him, not from our appearance, our performance or our net worth.
This Explains How You Can Begin A Personal Relationship With God Now!
Womens Suits From $49 Mens Suit $59 Top Selling Designer Church Dresses
The Biggest Mistake Women Make That Kills A Man’s Attraction
When we remember that truth, criticism bounces off us like BBs ricocheting off a rhino. The trouble is that we forget.
We seek others’ approval. When they reject us instead, it hurts. By taking our eyes off God and his acceptance and putting them on the conditional acceptance of our boss, spouse, or friend, we set ourselves up to be hurt. We forget that other people are incapable of unconditional love.
How to Forgive: Understanding Others
Even when other people’s criticism is valid, it’s still hard to take. It reminds us that we have failed in some way. We didn’t measure up to their expectations, and often when they remind us of that, tact is low on their priority list.
Sometimes our critics have ulterior motives. An old proverb from India goes, “Some men try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others.” They try to make themselves feel better by making others feel bad. You have probably had the experience of being put down by a nasty remark. When that happens, it is easy to forget that others are broken just like us.
Jesus understood the brokenness of the human condition. No one knows the human heart like him. He forgave tax collectors and prostitutes, and forgave his best friend Peter, for betraying him. On the cross, he even forgave the people who killed him. He knows that humans-all humans-are weak.
For us, though, it usually doesn’t help to know that those who have hurt us are weak. All we know is that we were injured and we can’t seem to get over it. Jesus’ command in the Lord’s Prayer seems too hard to obey: “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” (Matthew 6:12,NIV)
How to Forgive: Understanding the Trinity’s Role
When we have been hurt, our instinct is to hurt back. We want to make the other person pay for what they did. But exacting revenge steps over the line into God’s territory, as Paul warned,
Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. (Romans 12:19,NIV)
If we cannot take revenge, then we must forgive. God commands it. But how? How can we let it go when we have been unjustly hurt?
The answer lies in understanding the Trinity’s role in forgiveness. Christ’s role was to die for our sins. God the Father’s role was to accept Jesus’ sacrifice on our behalf and forgive us. Today, the Holy Spirit’s role is to enable us to do those things in the Christian life we cannot do on our own, namely forgive others because God has forgiven us.
Refusing to forgive leaves an open wound in our soul that festers intobitterness, resentment, and depression. For our own good, and the good of the person who hurt us, we simply must forgive. Just as we trust God for oursalvation, we have to trust him to make things right when we forgive. He will heal our wound so we can move on.
In his book, Landmines in the Path of the Believer, Charles Stanley says:
We are to forgive so that we may enjoy God’s goodness without feeling the weight of anger burning deep within our hearts. Forgiveness does not mean we recant the fact that what happened to us was wrong. Instead, we roll our burdens onto the Lord and allow Him to carry them for us.
Rolling our burdens onto the Lord-that’s the secret of the Christian life, and the secret of how to forgive. Trusting God.Depending on him instead of ourselves. It’s a hard thing but not a complicated thing. It’s the only way we can truly forgive.
ÔÇó More on What the Bible Says About ForgivenessÔÇó More Forgiveness Quotes
Related
What is forgiveness? Are believers considered clean by God? And what should our attitude be toward others who have hurt us?
Two types of forgiveness appear in the Bible: God’s pardon of our sins, and our obligation to pardon others. This subject is so important that our eternal destiny depends upon it.
What Is Forgiveness by God?
Mankind has a sinful nature. Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden, and humans have been sinning against God ever since.
God loves us too much to let us destroy ourselves in Hell. He provided a way for us to be forgiven, and that way is through Jesus Christ. Jesus confirmed that in no uncertain terms when he said, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6, NIV) God’s plan of salvation was to send Jesus, his only Son, into the world as a sacrifice for our sins.
That sacrifice was necessary to satisfy God’s justice. Moreover, that sacrifice had to be perfect and spotless.
guardian-angel-reading.com/Name
Find out the name of your Angel and what he can do to help You!
Only God Can Give You Life. Start A Personal Relationship With God Now!
Try Audible with A Free Audiobook. Download Now & Start Listening!
Because of our sinful nature, we cannot repair our broken relationship with God on our own. Only Jesus was qualified to do that for us. At the Last Supper, on the night before hiscrucifixion, he took a cup of wine and told his apostles,“This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.” (Matthew 26:28, NIV)
The next day, Jesus died on the cross, taking thepunishment due us, and atoning for our sins. On the third day after that, he rose from the dead, conquering death for all who believe in him as Savior. John the Baptistand Jesus commanded that we repent, or turn away from our sins to receive God’s forgiveness. When we do, our sins are forgiven, and we are assured of eternal life in heaven.
What Is Forgiveness of Others?
As believers, our relationship with God is restored, but what about our relationship with our fellow human beings? The Bible states that when someone hurts us, we are under an obligation to God to forgive that person. Jesus is very clear on this point:
Matthew 6:14-15For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (NIV)
Refusing to forgive is a sin. If we receive forgiveness from God, we must give it to others who hurt us. We cannot hold grudges or seek revenge. We are to trust God for justice and forgive the person who offended us. That does not mean we must forget the offense, however; usually that’s beyond our power. Forgiveness means releasing the other from blame, leaving the event in God’s hands, and moving on.
We may resume a relationship with the person if we had one, or we may not if one did not exist before. Certainly the victim of a crime has no obligation to become friends with the criminal. We leave it to the courts and to God to judge them.
What is forgiveness? The entire Bible points to Jesus Christ and his divine mission to save us from our sins. The Apostle Peter summed it up like this:
Acts 10:39-43We are witnesses of everything he did in the country of the Jews and in Jerusalem. They killed him by hanging him on a cross, but God raised him from the dead on the third day and caused him to be seen. He was not seen by all the people, but by witnesses whom God had already chosen-by us who ate and drank with him after he rose from the dead. He commanded us to preach to the people and to testify that he is the one whom God appointed as judge of the living and the dead. All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name. (NIV)
What does the Bible say about forgiveness
Forgiveness in the Bible is a prominent theme. Yet, it’s not uncommon for Christians to have questions about forgiveness. The act of forgiving does not come easy for most of us. Our natural instinct is to recoil in self-protection when we’ve been injured. We don’t naturally overflow with mercy, grace and understanding when we’ve been wronged.
Is forgiveness a conscious choice, a physical act involving the will, or is it a feeling, an emotional state of being? The Bible offers insight and answers to these and other questions about forgiveness. We’ll take a look at the most frequently asked questions and find out what Scripture says about forgiveness.
1. Is forgiveness a conscious choice, or an emotional state?
Forgiveness is a choice we make through a decision of our will, motivated by obedience to God and his command to forgive.
The Bible instructs us to forgive as the Lord forgave us:
Colossians 3:13Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
This Explains How You Can Begin A Personal Relationship With God Now!
guardian-angel-reading.com/Name
Find out the name of your Angel and what he can do to help You!
The Biggest Mistake Women Make That Kills A Man’s Attraction
2. How do we forgive when we don’t feel like it?
We forgive by faith, out of obedience. Since forgiveness goes against our nature, we must forgive by faith, whether we feel like it or not. We must trust God to do the work in us that needs to be done so that our forgiveness will be complete.
3. How do we translate the decision to forgive into a change of heart?
God honors our commitment to obey Him and our desire to please him when we choose to forgive. He completes the work in his time. We must continue to forgive by faith (our job) until the work of forgiveness (the Lord’s job) is done in our hearts.
Philippians 1:6 And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesusreturns. (NLT)
4. How will we know if we have truly forgiven?
Lewis B. Smedes wrote in his book, Forgive and Forget, “When you release the wrongdoer from the wrong, you cut a malignant tumor out of your inner life. You set a prisoner free, but you discover that the real prisoner was yourself.”
We will know the work of forgiveness is complete when we experience the freedom that comes as a result. We are the ones who suffer most when we choose not to forgive. When we do forgive, the Lord sets our hearts free from the anger, bitterness, resentment and hurt that previously imprisoned us.
Most times, however, forgiveness is a slow process.
Matthew 18:21-22Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. (NIV)
This answer by Jesus makes it clear that forgiveness is not easy for us. It’s not a one-time choice and then we automatically live in a state of forgiveness. Forgiveness may require a lifetime of forgiving, but it is important to the Lord. We must continue forgiving until the matter is settled in our heart.
5. What if the person we need to forgive is not a believer?
Prayer is one of the best ways to break down the wall of unforgiveness in our hearts. When we begin to pray for the person who has wronged us, God gives us new eyes to see and a new heart to care for that person.
As we pray, we start to see that person as God sees them, and we realize that he or she is precious to the Lord. We also see ourselves in a new light, just as guilty of sin and failure as the other person. We too are in need of forgiveness. If God did not withhold his forgiveness from us, why should we withhold forgiveness from another?
6. Is it okay to feel anger and want justice for the person we need to forgive?
This question presents another reason to pray for the person we need to forgive. We can pray for God to deal with the injustices, for God to judge the person’s life, and then we ought to leave that prayer at the altar. We no longer have to carry the anger. Although it is normal for us to feel anger toward sin and injustice, it is not our job to judge the other person in their sin.
Luke 6:37 Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. (NIV)
7. Why must we forgive?
The best reason to forgive is because Jesus commanded us to forgive. We learn from Scripture, if we don’t forgive, neither will we be forgiven:
Matthew 6:14-16For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (NIV)
We also forgive so that our prayers will not be hindered:
Mark 11:25And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. (NIV)
In summary and in closing, we forgive out of obedience to the Lord. It is a choice, a decision we make. However, as we do our “forgiving,” we discover the command is in place for our own good, and we receive the reward of our forgiveness, which is freedom.